the danger of overworking things

one perfectly good drawing of a mafioso piggy.



when things go too far.



*sigh*

technorati tags: Art, illustration

anyone else sick of this cold?

I'm waiting for a little carnaval inspiration on the telly... get those boobs dangling, do that crappy samba... but in the meantime, here's a little drawing to remind you how cold you are. Remember the blazing summer sun? I don't. It's too long ago.

I was lying in the bath last night, hallucinating with fatigue and an awful cold and awfully hot water (and if one more pt person tells me that baths are dangerous, I'm gonna sock 'em), and I worked out that to sort out most of the problems in the world, I just need to sit everyone in a big room (you know the type, the hotel conference room, all decked out in pink, with those really strange pink plush chairs and gold coloured frames, with bad filter coffee and the most boring biscuits in the box on a nylon table-clothed table in the corner) and I'll just tell them a few things. With slides (your fault, putting ideas in my head). And the whole world would be a better place. Easy.

It's just getting them there that's the problem.


technorati tags: Art, illustration

nothing like being oneself

When one is a "funny" person can it be a bit difficult being a "serious" person?
When one does "serious" instead of "funny" do other people/artists/writers worry terribly about being called pretentious... (in my case, nasty tutor-ghosts from pre-art school (ie. foundation level) days talk to me in my head)?

On the other hand, I worry terribly about people/artists/writers who NEVER do funny. Is that TERRIBLY wrong of me? Or them?

Today, I kind of wanted to draw the cling-filmed-chicken-that-had-its-head- still-attached-though-hidden-underneath-and-its-feet-royally-stuck-up-its-own arse-all-waiting-for-me-to-be-feeling-rather-ill-on-opening-said-clingfilm-and discovering-said-head-and-feet-and-shrieking-rather-loudly-and-being-horrified- at-my-own-patheticness-episode that I lived last night... but I couldn't bring myself to draw the chicken nor could I face getting into it with the pro-chicken or anti-chicken or "hey hey it's clingfilm!" or "how is THAT free range if it's dead" lobbyists out there or in here. and not quite feeling up to it anyway with yet another stinking cold (I have been told, - thanks CC ;)- that I am destined to be plagued with minor illness until the end of July according to my chinese year sign (dog!)... hurrrumph... great... but at least it's not major illness, touch lots of wood, quick) and so ended up drawing something a bit more serious, less silly, more melancholic, more related to my lack of any kind of energy, creative or otherwise.

It was a lovely week here spent with lifelong friends visiting from the States (who, by the way, loved Portugal... mostly the cakes), talking and catching up and being funny and playing with adorable kids and seeing bits of Portugalândia and eating cakes... and several more cakes and just being. It was such a relaxed week with no pro- nor anti-chicken or "hey hey vit, why are you doing that?" lobbyists at all, just lots of cake and fun, that the pain in the arse that is my continuing fight with the insurance companies paled into insignificance and I have decided to buy an armoured truck next, so that even if some eejit neighbour wants to drive into me it'll only be his eejit car that gets pranged.

Well, there. And now I'm using up the end of the firewood in an enormous inferno. Bliss. Except I have to go and make some supper for everyone now. But hey. I'm brilliant. I can do anything with a cold roast chicken and a packet of filo pastry, even if I do feel like shit.

P.S Mr Wally Torta has done his second great blogstory illo for chapter 12. Thanks, Wally.

technorati tags: Art, illustration

Guess What!

Chapter TWELVE (not ten... thank you vitsma... sigh) is UP! by the lovely Miss ClairMerialc (not QUITE the palindrome) (I've had it for a couple of days, but I've not been here... so sorry....)

Anyway.... GO READ IT!

technorati tags: Art, illustration

chilling out. hot sky. talking nonsense. as usual.

clouds

My favourite sign in Portuguese

Well. I think it's high time that strange people stood up for their right to jolly well enter. Don't you?

I mean, you can't help being born strange. It just happens.

I, though, am incredibly lucky that being entirely normal and well adjusted, able to enter almost anywhere I choose.

Really, down with discrimination against the strange people.

*sigh*



technorati tags: Art, illustration

straight down rain

The rain is here and it's falling straight down. The best kind. And last night I walked home in it. Pure bliss. I got my trouser legs soaked up to the knee and the cuffs of my coat dripping wet. Sogríssima insisted that she give me a lift home to keep dry. I had to fight to be able to walk home to clear my head and soak my shoes.

Obviously, no one saw me, as they were all shut up indoors, hiding, cowering from the murderous rain. Even the dogs. So I wasn't reported to the BataPolice (The Old ladies of the village who give you an earbattering).

I sneezed this morning.

"SEE!?" said sogríssima. "I told you so!"

There's no telling her that I have allergies.

technorati tags: Art, illustration

amusing dictators

Another illo from last month's Atlântico (and if you click on this, you'll see this month's cover). While I'm busy catching up with life after this week of car-crud, gate-collapsing (again) and shed loads of work, I'll be concocting some proper blog posts in my head ... of happy things I hope, instead of merda. I do like that word, merda. I like saying it in French too. Merde. Of course, it's almost the last word I remember in French, the rest having been displaced by Portuguese. Pois é.

And the drawing? I like it for the fat Pinochet and the daffy looking Castro.



Of course, most importantly, have you seen who's la presidente?



Did you know that Carmen Miranda (click on this for a clip of why Brazil is just too cool for its own good) was born in Portugal and not Brazil?

technorati tags: Art, illustration

uma grande merda

Uma grande merda. some of the first words necessary to learn in the Portuguese language.

Why? and why has there been skant vitrioliquizing this week?

Sigh. Double sigh.

The story in brief:

Monday afternoon. my car is happily parked outside my house and I am happily parked inside for a quick coffee and scribble before having to nip off out again (ah, the life of an illustrator who nips!)

Crrrruuuuuunch!


Sigh! We all know that sound.


I nip (see?) outside, heart in my socks, for I've had a bad feeling about this week, since my daughter lost my lucky bracelet under her bed, the lady who does stuff to our "garden" collapsed on the front path with an embollism in the brain and the lady who does stuff to our "house" came down with pneumonia.

And I was right. A neighbour of mine had "got distracted" and crashed into my car which was had been right up on the pavement. So he must have been working really hard at being distracted.


Sigh.


Something inside me immediately said "oh, bollocks".


And I was right.


Since Monday afternoon I have had no car. I am the only one that drives in our house and it is our only car. (before you ask, public transport...hahahahaha.)


And I spend a good while on phones and emails and all that, only to discover that my insurance claim is being approved and then being denied..... because the other guy hasn't paid his premium.


Sigh. Big fucking sigh.


So, I ask him. "Que grande merda" he says, "I did pay", and he proves to me that he did. So we go together to his agent.


"Oh, yes" they whine, "he did pay, three weeks ago, but we only tell the company when we do our accounts every two or three weeks".


So I've had MY process cancelled because they're too fucking stupid to know that the new law that came into being on the 1st off January this year means that my insurance claim can be cancelled because he APPARENTLY hadn't kept up his premium because they were so fucking lazy (or greedy, maybe they collect interest off the premiums paid). So he looks shite in the eyes of his insurers.


And I spent ALL of yesterday on the phone.


And I spent ALL (does 10 till 4.30 count as ALL day?) of today in town, in the offices of the two insurers, trying to sort it out.


And now I haven't worked for three days. (before you ask, if i ever want to see my car again, this is what I've had to do... otherwise, no car or hundreds and hundreds of euros in repair bills)


And all this for sitting in my kitchen drinking a quick cup of coffee and having a quick scribble.


Que grande merda. As my dearest (can you tell I got a lovely box of choccies for valentine's day?) portuguese other 'arf never tires of reminding me: Portugal is paradise until you have a problem. Then it's a big pile of....


technorati tags: Art, illustration

post the 603rd

if you want to see Vitriolica Webb's Ite come NOT last but one in any blog awards this year (always the bridesmaid, never the .... ), do go and vote for me at fistful of euros' Satin Pyjama awards (thank you guy, dearest) for Vitikins....in the personal weblog category, that is, if you want to. I'm not going rashly promise the wearing of any such satin pyjamas for any pervie psycho photo posting as a bribe (it wouldn't be a pretty sight!) ;) but if everyone who visits today voted for me, then that would be truly groovy and if I won I'd PAINT something really pervie instead!

Give me respect, you WORM!

Another day, another campaign... this time against bloody minded rudeness. These dreadful people who expect everyone to respect them, to call them respectful names like doutor, engenheiro, bigheadedtwat (actually, do try that last one), who expect people to drop their jaws in awe at their 4x4s and flashy middle class nouveau riche glitter BUT who can't even find the decency in themselves to show enough respect of others to shut the hell up when someone is performing a show less than six metres away from them, specifically for them, the AUDIENCE (the clue is in the latin), AND for the purposes of charity, not bloody profit....*and breathe*... should be bloody well told to shut the f up. Loudly, rudely, humiliatingly and painfully. BY LAW.


Be warned... prepare to be humiliated by a deranged Englishwoman if you do that kind of shit in public.


technorati tags: Art, illustration

thought for today

a thought for today. for my 601st post. while I'm working my arse off with non-blog business:

Ian McShane NEVER said "cocksucker" when he was Lovejoy.

an early morning quickie

post that is, before more extensive blogging later on.

Two things:

If you haven't seen the Euro City Blog that is "Shortcut" go there right now. I'm telling you. It's a blog all about Europe and Europeans and is very interesting.... ESPECIALLY interesting today, as they've got a bit of the Vit on show, a whirlwind tour of Portuguese Expatness. So, do it. Now. You've been told.

And the second thing: coo, thanks blogger peops for making me a blog of note yesterday. Oh, how I have dreamed of this day.....

So, if you're a newbie here from there and have no notion of Europe and want a primer in Euroness, go to Shortcut! :)

Proper posting resumes in a bit when I've got rid of this hangover. mwah mwah.

up its own backend?

I wonder if you've noticed the amount of RETRO out there. I don't mean the Retro fans who buy and dress up and use Retro Stuff, fabric, clothes, paraphernalia etc. I mean the creatives/illustrators/designers who roll it out, basing all their work on styles of the forties, the fifties, the sixties, the seventies. The market seems to be flooded with it.

I don't mean an illustrator shouldn't have Retro in their armoury. To have any chance of working for more than a couple of years when one's "style" is in fashion, one needs to have recourse to as many strings in the illustrative bow as possible. One also needs to be able to draw. But hey. I'm not going there. Not today. Not till I do my "artists and illustrators must be able to draw, otherwise how can they....?" post, when I shall no doubt attract disgruntlement from some place or other.

But back to Retro. There is SO much retro being created out there, especially on the other side of the pond, primarily in the form of illustration and animation, that one of these days it's going to lose any meaning. The retro style produced today won't be distinguishable from the retro it aims to imitate. Yes, they were the golden days of imaculate and clever design using beautiful lithography that we are too advanced technologically to have to think too hard about, and of course they should be celebrated... ... ... oh god... I've turned into a bore.

What I'm trying to say is, what will they retro-ize when it's time to retro-ize now? Retro?

Or put another way: is Retro going to disappear up its own bum?



technorati tags: Art, illustration, Retro

Coisas Civilizadas

Ah, Satire. (What this drawing satirizes is anyone's guess... i have no idea) Satire, the great and powerful tool of writers and artists in the last two or three hundred years in the civilized parts of the world where DEMOCRACY is key. Innumerable are the instances that satire has got the message out there to the people, informed us, made us laugh at ourselves, kept the fire in us burning. That's what I call civilization.

At three o'clock today some good people of Portugal are convening outside the embassy of Denmark in Lisbon as an act of solidarity to the Danish people (cartoonist and non cartoonists alike), standing up for freedom of expression the world over. I wish I could be there. I can't.
Go there if you can. Rua Castilho 14.

Here in Portuguese:


"COMUNICADO - CONVITE

Na próxima 5ª feira, 9 de Fevereiro, pelas 15 horas, um grupo de cidadãos portugueses irá manifestar a sua solidariedade para com os cidadãos dinamarqueses (cartoonistas e não-cartoonistas), na Embaixada da Dinamarca, na Rua Castilho nº 14, em Lisboa.

Convidamos desde já todos os concidadãos a participarem neste acto cívico em nome de uma pedra basilar da nossa existência: a liberdade de expressão.

Não nos move ódio ou ressentimento contra nenhuma religião ou causa. Mas não podemos aceitar que o medo domine a agenda do século XXI.

Cidadãos livres, de um país livre que integra uma comunidade de Estados livres chamada União Europeia, publicaram num jornal privado desenhos cómicos.

Não discutimos o direito de alguém a considerar esses desenhos de mau gosto. Não discutimos o direito de alguém a sentir-se ofendido. Mas consideramos inaceitável que um suposto ofendido se permita ameaçar, agredir e atentar contra a integridade física e o bom nome de quem apenas o ofendeu com palavras e desenhos num meio de comunicação livre.

Não esqueçamos que a sátira – os romanos diziam mesmo "Satura quidem tota nostra est" – é um género particularmente querido a mais de dois milénios de cultura europeia, e que todas as ditaduras começam sempre por censurar os livros "de gosto duvidoso", "má moral", "blasfemos", "ofensivos à moral e aos bons costumes".

Apelamos ainda ao governo da república portuguesa para que se solidarize com um país europeu que partilha connosco um projecto de união que, a par do progresso económico, pretende assegurar aos seus membros, Estados e Cidadãos, a liberdade de expressão e os valores democráticos a que sentimos ter direito.

Pela liberdade de expressão, nos subscrevemos

Rui Zink

Manuel João Ramos

Luísa Jacobetty"


technorati tags: Satire, cartoons, solidarity

sometimes a girl feels like doing something really naughty

technorati tags: Art, illustration

if you want to know what this is...

...then you have to go and read the fantastic chapter by aunty marianne AGAIN, cos it just got illustrated! (sorry it took so long, blogstoriers, this strange bug laid me out for so long... it seems that half the village has it... it's awful...)

And if you're wondering why I haven't tagged anyone with that meme... well, I'm taking a stand. Against MEMES.

Down with memes.

Down with memes.

Memes offend blogs.

Memes offend the creators of blogs.

I don't like them... I've just decided...even though memes have been out there for EVER.

I shall take to the streets and threaten violence to the memes.

Memes should be beheaded for daring to ask me questions!




*sigh*


see how things get out of hand?



technorati tags: Art, illustration

la la la la la

Today I woke up feeling like this. Ha. This getting ill business really changes as one gets older, unfitter, busier, doesn't it? It's taking me days to get better, far longer than it used to. Age really does sneak up on a girl. Time to make some NEW new year's resolutions. Eat better. Get proper exercise. Get sleep. HAVE MORE FUN! Write more drivel. Draw more nonsense. Yeah. And the exercise comes in the form of jumping more on the trampoline. NOT bloody jogging. That would be silly.

Now, I've been bloody well meme-tagged by my fellow Devonian/Big Blogger/Blogstory-ier, Dr. Rob. *sigh* thanks Wibbtastic.

So, here goes...

4x4 meme

4 places I have lived:
North Glorious Devon
London
Cambridge
Edinburgh


4 jobs I have had:
Graphic Designer (rubbish)
Barmaid (brilliant)
Meat Packer (now that was FUN)
Software consultant (hahahahahaha)


4 favourite movies (this week)
Wizard of Oz (for the shoes)
Brief Encounter (for the sheer nonsense of it)
The Deerhunter. *sigh*
Moulin Rouge. *sigh*


4 favourite TV shows (this week)
Desperate Housewives
Antiques Roadshow
Medium (I fancy the husband!)
The Office (my life for several years)


4 favourite CD’s
The Bends - Radiohead
Stone Age Woo - The Zorch sounds of Nervous Norvus
Screamadelica - Primal Scream
Sheherazade - Rimsky Korsakov


4 places I have been on holiday
Goa
The East coast of US, top to bottom in one go, on my own.
France
Spain


4 things I love to do
Cook
Eat
BLOG
Draw

4. Favourite Books
I Leonardo
Shipping News
Freakonomics - even though I'm only half way through... bloody brilliant.
The one I'm writing. :p

4 websites I visit daily
Mike, the Diva who is Troubled
Zoe and the Twat
Technorati!!!!!
and most recently forksplit


technorati tags: Art, illustration

OI!

er...wobble... wobble... crash...

technorati tags: Art, illustration

Chapter Nine Illo

Dr F's illo is up on chapter nine! she's been having terrible probs with her computer so it's very good of her to do this, thanks dr f. :)

I on the other hand am having terrible probs with my health AGAIN, (nothing serious, just bedridden) so I'm being a bit slow with my illo for Chapter 11. But, I'll see what I can do today.

*sigh*

in the meantime, check out this blog, which I've probably been a bit slow in finding: objectos.blogspot.com which I suspect has an awful lot to do with the ever bonkers webcedario. It helps if you speak portuguese. But you'll get the drift of most of it if you speak latin. :)