green!

After some extensive and diligent research (i.e. it occurred to me this morning in my car) I have another new theory.

AND IT IS THIS: (this required an ! but WHERE do you put the ! when you've already used a : ? Lynne Truss, where are you when I need you?)

Each country has its own car colour of crap-driving-ness.

Oh yes. You see, I've noticed recently (this morning) that among the different types of bad driver (of which Portugal, we all know, has more than its fair share) - the too fast, the too slow, the too keen to overtake you on a bend - there is a certain driver who is a bit ditzy, a bit scatty, a bit LOST at the wheel.

And do you know what colour car he/she drives? It's GREEN.

And I was thinking this think that I thunk (I was brought up on Winnie the Pooh, dontcha know) and thought, oh god, no, it can't be green, (but it is, I've been watching green cars all morning) it just can't be green, both the vit-parents have green cars and god forbid they get back home on Sunday night to discover that they are both better off the road because vit says so because, really, they are pretty good... really... (but the colour IS green for the love of god, tell the truth!) ... so then I thought a little harder and concretized my theory (I expect SOMEONE will have a go at me for concretized... well HAH, who cares, I'm tough, me... ) and decided that green is the crap driver car colour for Portugal. For Britain it must surely be BROWN! Though if it's up for discussion, maybe we should have an all-singing all-dancing international conference (with lots of booze, bloody good food and baby-sitters, cos let's face it, that's why I don't drink enough: a lack of baby-sitting) to thrash it out.

You see, you come here for god knows what, you leave with SCIENTIFIC FACT.